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Relationship Information > Pat me to a higher...Self-esteem

When a person suffers..........

..............from low self-esteem and is challenged with lets say: jealousy issues, it magnifies by the thousands and this is not a joke nor is it an exaggeration. Then, not only do they have to deal with the pains of negative  thinking, but they also have to deal with the guilt of how their peers are judging their thoughts. That my friends doubly sux.

When a person suffers..........

..............from low self-esteem...it is even harder to step forward to accept any challenge because they do not feel that they are worthy of any type of acknowledgement or even a pat  on the back no matter what they do.

I want to get into the guts of this so called characteristic flaw, known as ..low self-esteem. I hate it's very presence and I hate even more how so many people find reasons to call it, whining, bitching or a better one is "your issues". BLAH. Those people have no idea what  true loneliness is about.

Seriously, who on this earth wants to feel lonely, or worry about every damn thing , or get caught in a thought that does not want to change its track. Grrrr I say .

Low self-esteem is the total opposite of Happiness.

Low self-esteem is a very lonely world.

Low self-esteem cries out to be understood.

Low self-esteem is the outcome of how our society has made women today feel about themselves as real women.

Low self-esteem has taken women's confidence and turned it into jello.

Low self-esteem knows no size, color, or education degree or gender.

For those of you out there reading this and saying.."get laid" or "get a life" or "stop your pms`ing",  BITE ME!

Women suffer childbirth and PMS and Menopause and we have to try to co-habitate with the opposite sex. Do you really think that if we could, we would not have kicked this self-esteem loser to the curb long ago. Frig! Get a grip and put your  "little box" thinking in the corner for a minute please.  If we are at any time making ourselves heard on this issue, it is truly a cry for help, so that we can be happy and live  a good life and give good feelings to the world around us.

Sometimes people make noise for a reason, and yes , Peter cried wolf once to many times, but, does that have to be a rule of thumb with every  thing for the rest of us? PLEASE , PLEASE. HEAR OUR CRIES.

HOW, you ask,  can one help a person suffering from this hell ?

Show them the love. Show them you do not blame them. Show them you understand their loneliness and tell them you are there and that no way in hell is a word like low self-esteem going to scare them away or make you think less of them.

And that yes, it is frustrating for you also to see them caught in this prison of pain.

Hug them a lot and understand that when they react negatively to an issue, it really is not them and it is not against you personally. Its the issue at hand that is being attacked. But most of all Pat them on the back every chance you get to show them that they are worth it.

If you think that we do not  feel how confused we make you, with all of our reactions, well you have never been so wrong. We feel it and we know it and we carry the guilt of it every day. In short, we are in this dilemma together. It is like accepting ones flaws. We do it every day, because we are all different in many ways.

We want to conquer this "self-esteem" cliche', as much as you never want to hear it. "Who was that?" , "Why were you looking at her?",  "Am I fat?", "Does this look good on me?", "Did I do a good job?".

A Pat on the back is a definite feeling that will Pat you to a higher self-esteem, whether it be through your own positive self talk or in something you may have done to make someone else pat you for a job well done.
Either way a pat on the back is a positive thing to receive.

Who doesn`t like to be pat on the back?
That's like who doesn`t like sex, is it not?

The happiest person around will not tire of that feeling, even the grumpiest person will feel warm to the feeling of a pat on the back.

For those who do not like a Pat on the back for a job well done, they are too busy patting their own back. I call them the totally self- reliant type. Go them!!
But for us who really like that feeling of pleasing someone with a job well done, I will be first in line for that "Pat"... Pat me baby Pat me.(wink)
One of the most effective ways to strengthen your self-esteem is to achieve something and then say to yourself,  "I did good".

The feeling the you get from a pat on the back can come in many forms. It can be an acknowledgment of a job well done, a small gift, even a gesture like a smile or a nod, all send a message of appreciation.

We do not need to build a rocket in order to do a good job. To be able to feel that you have  risen above the challenge is one of the best medicines for self-esteem, no matter how small the task.

Low self-esteem  is not something that people conjour up just to add confusion and conflict to their lives. It's not  like they ordered it from Losers Anonymous, or are so bored that they have nothing better to do than want to shake things up.

It really does suck as does any other characteristic  flaw we inherit against our will or gain through a learned behavior. It is very unfair  to be left with the loneliness that low self-esteem creates within us.

And on that note people, "PAT" someone today to a higher self-esteem and you will make their day a very good day!




Dorothy Lafrinere



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Yes.. there is now a donation button in several spots around the selfesteem forum and the website.

This was not my idea...it actually came from a few of the self-esteem members as they understand the amount of time and monies that it takes to bring all of the information and self-esteem support to these pages for all of you.

The donation is set at its minimum of $1.00.
So ...do feel free to support womensselfesteem.com so that we can continue to support you!
Thank you so much in advance!

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